Day 462

Day 462 Record Keeping
Day 431 Fixed Meditation
Day 377 Bodyweight Exercise (2 typewriter pushups)
Day 304 Writing (research, 5 articles, 50 minutes!)
Day 477 Eating (75)
Day 112 Dynamic Meditation = 79 (20 min)
Day 59 Marketing = 69 (actionable task)
Great sleep, great wakeup. SICK, but much better. 

Dynamic Meditation Notes (20 minutes):
nothing much at all

Writing (5 articles in 50):
Was incredibly easy today. I had no idea was capable of this speed of research. Tomorrow I’m going to start the next phase, going back and just choosing which of the transitions I’ll use to connect the story and researched places together.

Day 460

Day 460 Record Keeping
Day 429 Fixed Meditation
Day 375 Bodyweight Exercise (2 typewriter pushups)
Day 302 Writing (research, 3 articles, 1 hour)
Day 475 Eating (69)
Day 110 Dynamic Meditation = 80 (20 min)
Day 57 Marketing = 77 (actionable task)
Great sleep, great wakeup. SICK

Dynamic Meditation Notes (20 minutes):
x5 fidgeting, minor

Writing (3 articles in 1 hour):

Day 457

Day 457 Record Keeping
Day 426 Fixed Meditation
Day 372 Bodyweight Exercise (3 bridges)
Day 299 Writing (research, 3 articles, 1 hour)
Day 472 Eating (64)
Day 107 Dynamic Meditation = 79 (20 min)
Day 54 Marketing = 69 (actionable task)
Good sleep, good wakeup. Yesterday had a bout of complete depletion. Today reversed order and worked on my big writing push first, which was much better. Still feeling that restlessness and depression, but I think that’s pretty normal when starting to really push something.

Dynamic Meditation Notes (20 minutes):
x3 fidgeting, minor

Writing (3 articles in 1 hour):
-Started in the morning with this.
-things progressed faster

Day 455

Day 455 Record Keeping
Day 424 Fixed Meditation
Day 370 Bodyweight Exercise (3 bridges)
Day 297 Writing (research, 2 articles)
Day 470 Eating (66)
Day 105 Dynamic Meditation = 79 (20 min)
Day 52 Marketing = 71 (actionable task)
Good sleep, great wakeup. Decided to start recording eating again…my eating has been really off lately.

Dynamic Meditation Notes (20 minutes):
x1 shoulders minor

Writing (2 articles in 1 hour)
-It was really tiring. Not necessarily difficult, but just tiring
-I can definitely streamline this more and do it faster
-only did 2 articles in 1 hour. I want to up this to 3 in an hour, AND I want to extend this to two hours

Day 447

Day 447 Record Keeping
Day 416 Fixed Meditation
Day 362 Bodyweight Exercise (2 typewriter pushups)
Day 289 Writing (editing)
Day 462 Eating (lax the last few days)
Day 97 Dynamic Meditation = 81 (2 hours 8 min)
Day 44 Marketing = 69 (editing)
Great sleep, great wakeup. TRAVELING. Lax on the food.

Dynamic Meditation Notes (2 hours 8 min):
several fidgeting
teeth grinding
A horrible negative arising which was countered pretty quickly

Day 440

Day 440 Record Keeping
Day 409 Fixed Meditation
Day 355 Bodyweight Exercise (2 back walkdowns 1 bridge)
Day 282 Writing (pitching 93 words)
Day 455 Eating 
Day 90 Dynamic Meditation = 80 (1 hour)
Day 37 Marketing = 68 (pitching/research)
Great sleep, great wakeup. Really lackluster performance on this dreary, rainy day. Just…dragging. Been sleeping a lot. Writing was just 93 words for a pitch I should’ve done yesterday. Dynamic meditation was 1 hour instead of 2 my research was the bare bare minimum. These days happen, what can you do except work better tomorrow. That attitude is much more solid in my mind which is a Good…no, a FANTASTIC thing.

Dynamic Med Notes (1 hour):
X1 anger/outrage
x3 fidgeting
Notes: Arisings are noticeably few and far between

Interesting how the Dark Night I had really tore out huge segments of suffering. Nevertheless I’m starting to notice other arisings - like little whispers that weren’t as noticeable before that are now audible. 

Day 439

Day 439 Record Keeping
Day 408 Fixed Meditation
Day 354 Bodyweight Exercise (25 lb kbell tabata)
Day 281 Writing (pitching)
Day 454 Eating
Day 89 Dynamic Meditation = 80 (2 hours, 40 min)
Day 36 Marketing = 65 (pitching)
Great sleep, great wakeup. Dynamic meditation feels much more ingrained - identity questions have shot up. Marketing is in flux now, but hey it’s ok it’s still being built up.

Dynamic Med Notes (2 hours, 40 minutes):
a few minor arisings
a few minor shoulder
much more subtle fluctuations than before
Notes: At the hour mark there’s an increase in fluctuation. I’m shooting for 2 hours, as I believe my dark night event allows me to go further with this.at the very end a lot of nervousness, but it subsided almost immediately as soon as I recognized it

Day 436

Day 436 Record Keeping
Day 405 Fixed Meditation
Day 351 Bodyweight Exercise (2 typewriter pushups)
Day 278 Writing (editing)
Day 451 Eating
Day 86 Dynamic Meditation = 80 (1 hour - FLOW)
Day 33 Marketing = 78 (Editing)
Great sleep, great wakeup.

Dynamic Med Notes (1 hour):
x2 fidgeting
x1 irritation
Notes: A preternatural sense of calmness with the moment. Experimented with flow, but it almost wasn’t even necessary. It feels like a huge weight lifted - I need to monitor if this state lasts.

Day 434

Day 434 Record Keeping
Day 403 Fixed Meditation
Day 349 Bodyweight Exercise (KBell Tabata)
Day 276 Writing (pitch writing)
Day 449 Eating
Day 84 Dynamic Meditation = 79 (20 min  - Vipassana)
Day 31 Marketing = 74 (pitching)
Good sleep, good wakeup.

Dynamic Med Notes (20 min):
Decided to do Vipassana today. It was incredibly difficult to sustain while talking and doing anything else other than sitting around. Thinking about cycling back and forth with my own Dynamic Meditation style which directly prevents negative arisings and Vipassna, where you merely note and watch the arisings crescendo and pass away.

Day 433

Day 433 Record Keeping
Day 402 Fixed Meditation
Day 348 Bodyweight Exercise (3 bridges)
Day 275 Writing (editing)
Day 448 Eating
Day 83 Dynamic Meditation = 78 (1 hour 5 min)
Day 30 Marketing = 75 (action + editing)
Ok sleep, good wakeup. 


Dynamic Med Notes (1 hour 5 min):
there were uprisings but they quickly blipped away - and this too after a frustrating conversation - but no fidgeting, fluctuations, shoulders, etc. First time.

Day 432

Day 432 Record Keeping
Day 401 Fixed Meditation
Day 347 Bodyweight Exercise (2 typewriter pushups)
Day 274 Writing (editing)
Day 447 Eating
Day 82 Dynamic Meditation = 72 (30 min)
Day 29 Marketing = 67 (action + editing)
Horrible sleep, slow wakeup. Last 4 days were weekend + messed up schedule with taking care of my mom for a surgery, which completely messed up my sleep schedule. In addition I’ve just been having horrible sleep. I think it’s because of my addiction to meditation. I start doing single pointed meditation right before going to sleep which seems to really mess up my sleep pattern. In addition my emotions have been all over the place since reaching first jhana - this has been reflected in my dynamic meditaiton. I’ll write about my experiences with it in another blog post.


Dynamic Med Notes (30 min):
x2 shoulders
Interrupted sessions twice - focus really bad in this.

Day 427

Day 427 Record Keeping
Day 396 Fixed Meditation
Day 342 Bodyweight Exercise (FULL 25 lb KBell Tabata)
Day 269 Writing (editing)
Day 442 Eating
Day 77 Dynamic Meditation = 78 (1 hour)
Day 24 Marketing = 73 (action + research)
Great sleep, great wakeup.  Excellent meditation, bodyweights. Cheat day for eating, and low will for marketing and writing. I think my threshold has been bad on days I do a full Tabata - I think I’ve naturally been cheating on those days, which is completely fine. I felt very low control with marketing which really really depressed me - that and writing. I think it’s really necessary to write out a list of tasks in a planner so I don’t have any question of what the next task is. Without a metric it can feel like I’m lost - working but not feeling like I’m progressing. That’s what I’m hoping the planner will counter.


Dynamic Med Notes (1 hour 10 min):
x7 shoulders
x6 fidgeting
x2 anger/irritation arising
innumerable arisings of fear and frustration and depression

Day 426

Day 426 Record Keeping
Day 395 Fixed Meditation
Day 341 Bodyweight Exercise (3 bridges)
Day 268 Writing (editing)
Day 441 Eating
Day 76 Dynamic Meditation = 76 (1 hour 10 min)
Day 23 Marketing = 74 (action + research)
Great sleep, great wakeup. I might’ve achieved first jhana in fixed meditation. Not sure, still researching. For writing Lydia suggested I do one week of writing and one week of editing to alternate. Makes sense considering I’ve lost that flow that I had during NaNoWriMo - I could write and write knowing that it was a first draft. AND when I was editing other people’s papers it was so crystal clear - I got into a rhythm of editing. That’s a concept that might be crucial for writing and other habits where I have cycling actions.

Dynamic Med Notes (1 hour 10 min):
x1 shoulders
x8 fidgeting
Notes: In fixed meditation I think I achieved first jhana. In it there was a switch that was flipped - I usually have a feeling of attention to force attention to keep on one object. But there was a transition where the concentration was “sticky” - it was easy to maintain, it was hard to get out of it, and it felt really good - the suffused pleasure of a mind that had found refuge in focusing on a topic.

I was trying to mimic that in fixed meditation as I did tasks that I find stressful. When I do marketing research or edit I’ve got all these other worries attacking me - just like in fixed meditation. There’s a tension of fighting them off and having this little space to myself. With first jhana that disappears - and is similar to the idea of flow - where just focus clears a path and it’s a relaxing focus. I didn’t get there today at all - things were really stressful. But I think I’m going to focus on this in future practices.

My theory is that if I can get into flow all the particulars of physicality - fidgeting, picking my lip, tightening of shoulders - will all fall away.

Day 425

Day 425 Record Keeping
Day 394 Fixed Meditation
Day 340 Bodyweight Exercise (1x8, 1x4 typewriter pushups)
Day 267 Writing (198 words)
Day 440 Eating
Day 75 Dynamic Meditation = 76 (1 hour)
Day 22 Marketing = 74 (action + research)
Great sleep, great wakeup. A little slow. FINALLY broke past my skill plateau on typewriter pushups! Frustrated at the low amount I’m doing for marketing - but hey that’s to be expected at this stage of a habit. Want to do more for writing - especially the polishing/editing part. Should really established minimums and ratcheting for each habit. Meditation is amazing. Didn’t record the last two days - I think taking weekends might actually do some good for me. 

Dynamic Med Notes ( 1 hour):
7x shoulders/tension
3x fidgeting
Innumerable arisings of tension
Notes: A lot of the arisings come from not having a properly outlined sequence for progression.For example, if I need pics for an article, I can sink all day slowly mucking around photos with no actual progress. Why? Because what is progress? Is it the number of photographs I’ve looked at? Is it the number I’ve edited, or the number of final photos I got in the end?

Day 422

Day 422 Record Keeping
Day 391 Fixed Meditation
Day 337 Bodyweight Exercise (stretches/3 bridges)
Day 264 Writing (107 words)
Day 437 Eating
Day 72 Dynamic Meditation = 76 (at least 1 hour)
Day 19 Marketing = 73 (action)
Great sleep, great wakeup.

Dynamic Med Notes (at least 1 hour):
x4 shoulders
x2 fidgeting
Notes: Nervous about an interview - Countered almost automatically by watching funny videos (louis ck, etc on youtube)

A great challenge to keep shoulders down and be relaxed and not have the butterflies while doing something real.

I’m trying to do single pointed because it does have a tendency to clear a space in my mind.

Day 420

Day 420 Record Keeping
Day 389 Fixed Meditation
Day 335 Bodyweight Exercise (1x8 typewriter pushups! FINALLY!)
Day 262 Writing (315 words)
Day 435 Eating
Day 70 Dynamic Meditation = 76 (20 min)
Day 17 Marketing = 65 (reading)
Great sleep, great wakeup. Nailed eating lately - had opportunities to cheat and automatically didn’t. Today I went to Freebirds (the best burritos in the world, in my opinion) and automatically chose to get it in a bowl without the tortilla - even though I gave myself permission to cheat! Fantastic fixed meditation practice. Finally busted out of my plateau with pushups to get to one full set of 8 typewriter pushups! 

Dynamic Med Notes (20 minutes):
-Felt unusually relaxed and focused today.
-Although I only recorded 20 minutes, I’ve been doing this almost all day with ease.
-This might have to do with the quality fixed meditation that I’ve been doing lately

Day 419

Day 419 Record Keeping
Day 388 Fixed Meditation
Day 334 Bodyweight Exercise (stretches, 3 bridges)
Day 261 Writing (223 words/edit)
Day 434 Eating
Day 69 Dynamic Meditation = 75 (1 hour 50 min)
Day 16 Marketing = 68 (action/reading)
Bad sleep, great wakeup.

Dynamic Med Notes (1 hour 50 min):
x3 fidgeting
x1 shoulders
x5 arising worry
x2 immense anger countered

Notes: Too much of a sympathetic feeling when I hear awkwardness when other people talk in social situations badly. I need to unhinge this.

-Anger comes up easily when I’m interrupted while absorbed in writing for a task I think is inconsequential. I still see some tasks, like writing, as trying to capture something in that moment, when I should understand that it’s already there, it’s a process that cannot be interrupted.